is this my emotion or yours?

What is mine and what is yours! I get so connected and tuned in with an intimate partner that I can mix up our emotions. Happen to you, too?

That's not a good thing.

It's better to perceive/observe the emotion. With clients and friends, no problem. But once I become intimate with someone, I keep blurring it. Blur, tangle, blur. I think I'm feeling heavy but the other person is, not me. Blurry.

The good thing is, I'm catching it quicker when it happens and can sort through it faster.

incredibly astute whose-emotion method that will shock & awe you....

"Is this mine?" Seriously. I ask myself that.
(When things are challenging, go to what is simple. Simple truths always work.)
----
YES
Yes is a more expansive, open, light, forward-moving vibe.
If yes:
I simply contemplate the emotion and originating thought and work with it.
----
NO
No is a more retracted, closed, dense, downward or backward moving vibe.
If no:
1. acknowledge. In my mind, "got it. okay. thanks, hon, this is yours."
2. let go. I express gratitude for knowing intimately the feeling then separate from it and let go of it. I want the knowledge, not the on-going experience. I usually then send love.
3. choose a response. Given knowledge of this particular emotion, and the fact that I personally feel it so intensely, I then choose what to do with it. When I feel anything really strongly, then I have an attachment to it. Sometimes I do the practice of Chod with it.
------
MIXED
If mixed: I do both. :)

Note: my son also suggests feeling the side of the body (left if it is other, right if it is mine). This also works for me.

minimizing tangling in the first place

• Space helps: I need personal space and meditative time, especially when in frequent intense emotion. Keeps me clear.
• Movement helps: walking, dancing.
• Singing helps: opens my heart and expression.
• Intention helps: I know this tangling happens to me, so my intent is to be 1) clear about what is mine and more importantly 2) notice and not absorb.

happy untangling....

why people turn to psychics in this economy

(tips for not picking up negative energy)

CBS aired a snippet on one particular business seeing a boom in this uncertain economy....psychics.

Not surprising really. People have questions about their finances, career, job. People want guidance.

But there's another factor, I believe. An actual psychic factor.

Many people who engage in psychic readings are themselves highly sensitive and in tune to psychic energy. Many individuals are highly empathic. As such, many of my clients are actually picking up on the vibe around them; energy of worry, fear, anxiousness as neighbors lose jobs and homes and media broadcasts negative news.

It isn't just thoughts my clients are having, but sensations around them they are also experiencing. So there is a mix of looking for certainty in uncertain times and dealing with uncertainty around us.

For sure there are some psychics out there that prey on fear and even breed fear. Just like there are lawyers, priests, doctors, etc that are unethical. But for sure a good psychic can definitely help, by helping you stay in your own skin, focus on your own purpose and see insightfully into your own blind spots. A good psychic can also help those of you who are highly empathic to not pick up other people's negativity. Here are a few tips I've discovered.

Tips for not picking up other people's negative/uncertain energy:

1. Get grounded. If you are really connected to the earth and your own body, you are less in your head or energy around you. Walk. Dance. Yoga. Be barefoot. Rub your hands together.


2. Shake off. If you know you are empathic or pickup on other people's emotions easily, then assume you may be carrying other people's stuff. Assume it. Make it part of your daily routine, like brushing your teeth, to shake off other people's energy. Literally, shake it off. Or stomp your feet (great one for when kids get home from school, too).


3. Shout or sing it off. If you're bottling up other people's feelings, or your own, loud vocalization is fantastic for clearing. Give a big shout. Or 5 shouts. Say "HA!" Even pound your chest. You'll feel the release. One teacher I know says to do this and shout, "everybody else outta the pool." We are constantly exchanging energy with others. When we know it, we can deal with it.


4. Send off. Put your hand on your belly and say, "If this is not mine, leave. If it is someone else's, gently go back to them. If it is no longer needed, mulch back into the earth." This may sound a bit hokey, but try it. You'll be lighter. It is all intention.


5. Check in and feed. Intentionally focus on any negativity sense you are experiencing. Then notice what you feel in your own body. Feel where it is. Notice its temperature, texture, density. Ask it what it wants and needs. Then place your hand on your heart and provide an answer outloud. You can even ask if the negativity is yours and see what happens. Either way, you can send love to the negativity to help resolve it. See Feeding Your Demons for details.


6. Stay in your own skin. Don't get overly involved in someone else's emotional problems. You can help best when you are objective, neutral. You can be compassionate and still help. Or you can compassionately choose not to help.


7. Do what you love. Doing what you love puts you in heart space. When you are in your own heart and joy it is harder to pickup negativity.


8. Be creative. As a creative being, your mind needs to be creatively engaged. If it isn't, you just get all jumbled up in your head. Even organizing the closet is creative. It keeps you in your own space, too.


9. Work with a psychic. Get guidance on your questions. Get another view of your own blind spots. As you have clarity and get other perspectives on the energy going on, you can move forward more easily and release blocked energy. Often a good psychic will help you validate and refine your perceptions. This all clears negativity, too. I also offer energy work or will sometimes do a short energy tune-up at the beginning or end of a session just to help someone feel clear, more fully themselves.

My son says it is possible to notice whether you are sensing something on the right side of the body (yours) or left side of the body (someone else's). It works.
See: a 12 year old explains how to disconnect.

I wonder how others stay clear of negativity. Always open to new ideas.