my name is bill

"You can call me Bill," my son Chad tells his science teacher on the first day of 8th grade science.

The teacher pauses. "Bill? Are you sure?"

"Yup. Call me Bill." Chad assures him.

Sensing something's off, the teacher asks the class if there is anyone who can confirm his name is Bill. When Chad tells me the story, he boasts, "Mom! You wouldn't believe it!! 3 people in the class raised their hands!!"

"Bill is an unusual nickname for someone named Chad. Are you sure you want to be called Bill for the rest of the year, cuz I'll call you that if you want," his teacher jokes.

When I asked Chad why he did it, he told me, "Why not!? I mean, what's it going to hurt to be called Bill 2 hours a week for a year."

Afterall, he didn't pick his own name, so why not try on a new one.

His dad was not pleased. I laughed my head off. Chad requested I support him on back-to-school night. When I met the teacher I smiled and said, "Hi, I'm Chad's mom. You know, Bill. Thanks for letting him do this little social experiment with his name."

Teacher was great. He didn't care. Told me he'd call him whatever he wanted and he wasn't disrupting anything.

Great attitude. Change your hair. Change your name. Change your clothes. Change your attitude. Try on something new. Yeah, Bill.

Motto: Shake it up a little.

what clock did i create...comeon...be psychic

"What clock did I create?" my son asked me of his shop (ahem, excuse me, technical education) project. "Come on! Guess! Be psychic."

"Oh. I dunno. I don't usually get stuff like that, sweets. I get more life lessons and stuff like that." I replied.

"Oh, Momma. Yes, you do. Just guess."

Breath. "Fire!" I said. (knowing most of the kids made footballs, seemed unlikely)

"Could be," he replied. "Guess again."

"Fire!" I insisted.

"Guess again," he replied again.

"Okay then. A campfire! A candle with a flame! A ball of fire! Red. Golden?!"

"Yup," he admits with a chuckle.

"Really? Ha! Fun! What exactly is the wood clock you made?"

"A comet! It's a red ball of fire. haha, Mom! Told you that you do see things like that."

Motto: Play psychic games. Be surprised.

that leaf left his family

I recall my son's younger days, when a walk by a tree's falling leaves in the autumn drew the empathic remark, "Ohhh. Look. That leaf left his family."

Such connection with the natural world.

I remember showing him the water crystals work of Dr Masuro Emoto (the effects of words and intentions on water) which drew a remarkably different response from adults than from him.

Adults logical comments were:
--has this experiment been successfully replicated?
--interesting implications if humans are 70% water
--how did he take pictures of water crystals?
--is this true of snow flakes? etc.

My son's response:
--"I feel sorry for that water."
--"Why would someone write hate?"
--"Of course the water would not like it."

I look for proof. My son knows.

Several stories about the nature of highly intuitive children are captured in Doreen Virtue's book, Crystal Children. I met Doreen and we spoke of my son and I sent her a few stories that she included in the book. In fact, my mom heard her speak once and she told a couple of my son's stories.

Motto: Notice children notice simple truths.

get outta my head

I often sing a silly song to my dog to the tune of Spiderpig, ahem, I mean Spiderman.
"Kodiak, Kodiak, does whatever a Kodiak does. Looks so cute. What a hoot. Lookout, here comes the Kodiak".... and so on, bathroom humor removed

The other day I started singing it to the tune of Jesus Christ Superstar, without realizing it.
"Kodiak, Cute-iak, cuddly, happy, licky, love me, fur attack. Kodiak, maniac...and so on"

Then I hear..."WHY ARE YOU SINGING THAT!? THAT'S NOT THE SAME TUNE!"

"Uh, dunno," I smartly replied. "Was it different? I can make up whatever studid song to whatever stupid tune."

"NO WAY. I'VE BEEN HUMMING THAT....IN MY HEAD....NOT OUT LOUD. GET OUTTA MY HEAD, GOOF!"

haha. We laughed. I was tempted to tease with what else I know...but truth is, I had no idea I was doing it. Lately I've been playing a little day-to-day-be-psychic game. That's what I got. :)

Motto as of late: Love me, love me, ruff, ruff

do you happen to be a genetic scientist?

"How will my husband do with a move?" I'm asked.

"Hmmm. Seems like his work opportunities wouldn't really be satisfying. 

It's kinda like this example..."

"A genetic scientist could be working on the whole genome or a chromosome. He's currently doing more big picture, whole genome, many variables. But he'd like to work on a focused topic, like a single chromosome, one genetic issue. And that opportunity for focusing exists here, not if you move. He'd be giving up the type of work and problems that satisfy him."

The consultation continues on various topics. As the client is leaving, she turns around and says, "Oh. By the way, my husband IS a genetic scientist." 

Tee, hee. I knew it was a helpful example, but I didn't even know it was that literal.

-------------------------------------

AND...to be continued...

Last week I was consulting with someone and told that story as an example of how intuition can work. Intend...then notice what you notice and share. Sometimes it can feel like a very clear thought. The story seemed useful, but a bit out of place...as if a different story would be better for her, but ahhh, I get what I get.

The next client sat down. I asked how he heard about me. "My wife," he says. 

And immediately, I know. "Ahhhh, you don't happen to be a genetic scientist, do you?" 

"That's me. Seems you may have some information for me, too."

Double tee, hee.

-------------------------------------

OH, AND....

As we're consulting, I'm aware of some personal noise I accumulated from someone who frequently told me scientists won't get this kind of thing. They need proof. Even though I know to share freely, I'm hearing his voice track a few times, breathing, releasing it and just doing what I do. The scientist listened and asked intently. I shared like I would with any client. 

Then I noticed a pattern I've seen. Sometimes (not always), highly 'in tune' people get messages that are more breadcrumbs and guidance on how to proceed, not the laid out answer. And he's getting the breadcrumbs. Ah, ha. Perhaps this scientist is highly in tune. Personal noise, down boy! Breathe.

Then, upon leaving, the scientist smiles, gives me a knowing wink, and says, "It's always nice to get spiritual guidance." 

Motto: Just do what you do. Some will like it, some won't. Whatev.

1,291,928,083 choices

So I'm approximately 1,291,928,083 seconds old. (you do the math)

Each second I choose how to spend my time. A billion choices of what I do, what I think about, how I feel.

Interesting. I spent the last 4 days unplugging. Time to myself. Realized I need to reel in some plans right now and move a little more day to day, step by step. At least for now. But while staying focused on my goals. Just not so focused on the plan. Then I can choose in each moment steps that move towards my goal.

Right now, those steps are Rest. As soon as I start to do anything else, my inner tuning pulls me back to rest.

Okay, okay. I put down the paintbrush. I put down the box. I turned off the phone. I picked up the wine glass. And a book. Hugged my son. Hammock time. I like this second.

don't argue with reality

Don't argue with reality.

Love what is.

'Nuff said.

in moments of doubt, how the answers flow

Sometimes I wonder....

"What am I doing?"
"Am I actually truly helping anyone?"
"Is psychic a distraction from the real inner work of conscious development?" (it can be)

And in those brief moments, all my thousands of moments of magic and beauty seem so far away. All the validation. All the proof. All of it vanishes for a moment, or hour, or day.

And then, without fail...An email, or a call.

"Meredith, I just want you to know I read the blog you wrote about me everyday. You've helped me SOOOO much."

"Meredith. Whenever I take a workshop with you I am so much more open and everything starts flowing. Everything seems so much clearer. I'm so thankful!"

Oh, oh timing. What a gift. How the answers to my questions flood back to me still amazes me.

As the years go on, my heart expands and I see so much beauty and courage of the human spirit. And I see so much more suffering and pain. I feel both more intensely. I like it that way. And I wonder how else I can make a difference, in my own life and the lives of others. And even though I don't operate on feedback, having some now and then still helps churn the engine.

easy :: not so easy

Learning to get intuitions. EASY.

• Decide you want intuitive guidance.
• It will find you. Really.
• Notice what you notice and follow it.
• Really that simple.

Learning to live true to yourself always. NOT SO EASY.

• Intuitive guidance ultimately connects you to mind-body-spirit balance. Oh, balance.
• When you're conscious and you're following the guidance, it will lead you to what you need. Not always what you want.
• Reorganizing your life to fit the ways you are changing on the inside. Challenging.
• Reorganizing your mind. Whoa.
• Making your emotions more intelligent. Whoooaaaaa.
• Dark night of the soul period. Period.
• Simplifying your life. Not always so simple.

Motto as of late: There's a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.

just dance - love this video!

Just dance. Even dance badly.

Check out Where the Hell is Matt? Love it!
http://www.vimeo.com/1211060

If you're thinking of job changing or life changing, you may want to hear Matt talk about his decision in the videos at the bottom of the this page About Matt:
http://wherethehellismatt.com/about.shtml

Motta as of late: Do what you love

it comes in a form that you aren't expecting

In keeping with my son's, and my, realization that it is good for me to be able to receive help more easily, I sat yesterday and sent out energy on my willingness to exchange energy around certain types of help I give freely (like ways I've helped people learn) and certain types of help I could use right now. I considered some possible forms of the assistance and just trusted I'd be surprised.

Oh, was I.

Yesterday I received a call from a dear friend who came right out and offered the type of help I need. And even mentioned how I helped him learn. Funny. And.....I said, "Oh, no. But thanks anyway." Change subject.

And yesterday, I received another call from a family member who came right out and said, "What can I do to help?" And I said, "Nothing. But thanks anyway."

DUH

And neither time did I even realize what I'd done until later talking with my mom on the phone.

DOUBLE DUH

Both forms of help weren't really in the form I wanted. Oh, hello. But probably exactly in the form I needed. And only partially in the physical need sense. More in the "spiritual need" sense.

Jury is still out on whether it's enough to notice how easily these people, both with lots of psychic sense though neither would describe it that way, connected and tuned in with me. I'm full of gratitude and tickled at what happened. Or do I have to actually receive the help. LOL.

Motto as of late: Duh, duh, duh, duhhhhhh.....duh, duh, duh, duhhhhhhh....

as a kid i 'just knew it'

Doing a bunch of house cleaning/clearing and lightening the load. Came across a folder with old notes and cards.

Several times I saw comments I wrote to others, such as:

• "I just KNEW it"
• "I just KNEW it"
• "I don't know where I got these notecards. They were just in my desk. They just appeared. But aren't they cute!"
• "I just KNEW it"

Worth a giggle.

Still pitched the folder and a dozen other bags of old stuff I just don't need anymore. As sweet as the giggle was, it isn't worth the weight or space of that folder.

Motto as of late: Travel lightly

it'll happen this september

"I don't think the person you're with is someone you'll be happy with long-term. I see you meeting a guy you'll marry in October and he is blah, blah, blah."

"Yes. I do believe you will be able to have children. Though with the assistance of in-vitro, not naturally. It'll happen in September. I see 9's. Yup. This September."

Specific. Way specific.

"Seems like it's possible this relationship could work out happily in the end. But right now it's undetermined. You need to center on you and your needs and just put them out there and see how he responds. Then you'll know. Oh, and stop nagging him. Instead, _____. He feels beat up and picked on by you and also others. He's tired and exhausted. There is some good energy in this relationship and potential though. You've put a lot of emotional investment into this, right? Well don't give up yet. Recenter. Lay off. In 2-4 weeks, put your needs out there and see what happens."

Uh, very different kind of specific.

I get what I get. I'm just a messenger.

they're both right

A client is working out some intricacies of intuition.

"Why did my vibes say to date him and that this is good?" And "Why did my vibes say he isn't right for me?" I was wrong.

AHHHH...but they were both right. Nice job. It was good to date him. MUCH came from the experience. And it's good to not date him forever. For many of the reasons she intuited and experienced, he isn't a good long-term match for her.

Start thinking of vibes as getting information about the essence of a situation, self, person. Then use the information to make a decision.
Stop thinking of it as getting the RIGHT answer. Stop waiting to be told what to do.

Just need to know what you need to know for right now. No more. No less.

Motto as of late: For now.

timing for no alcohol

Years ago another intuitive person and I had 'weird vibes' about her husband and alcohol.

Doesn't seem like an alcoholic?

But what is it? She thought something was wrong. My intuition confirmed. But vaguely. Something isn't right there. Not really sure what. Keep an eye out for him and alcohol.

Well...years become now and turns out his body is completely rejecting any alcohol at all. Psychotic reaction.

1. Bummer. But at least he loooovvveees icecream.
2. Timing. Timing. Timing.

Motto as of late: For now. (We know when we're supposed to know.)

now reactions are more subtle

Was hanging around with someone who did a little freak out. Got all blue. Dunno why.

Old Me would have responded intensely:

• What's wrong? Are you okay?
• What'd I do? Did I do something?
• What can I do? How can I fix it?
• What does this mean? Is this a sign?
• I hope everything's okay.
• What should I do?
• Feel better?!
• Etc....for minutes, hours, days...

Now Me did subtly:

• Let's walk.
• Sit?
• Ahhh. Pretty lake.
• I'm here.

It passed. All that was needed.

New day.

no coincidences

My client comes really early for no reason, some reason. I could go eat as planned now, or go ahead and work with her now then go eat. I'll go eat after. Feels right.

I'm introduced to another regular customer at counter while ordering. We briefly chat about how fantastic the owners are and how we love this place, Steam Cafe (17th and R, NW). He asks what I do. I tell him I'm an intuitive. He says, "No wonder. It's the energy here. You get it." Smile.

We chat briefly. Turns out he teaches the I Ching. I've always wanted to learn that. He says, "You know, no coincidences. Just meant to meet." Right on.

Then he mentions out loud, "I'm going to move here now. Need an apartment." And the owner says, "Why, I have an apartment for you. Just available now."

Voila. When you're really vibing, what you need often comes right to you.

lentil soup

Whenever I'm working down at Tulsi Holistic Living in Dupont Circle, I look forward to going to Steam Cafe (corner of 17th and R, NW...GO!). Moroccan owners. Their lentil soup, magnificent. And yesterday, bastilla I didn't even ask for but was phenomenal! Why? Just because. For you! You'll like it! No charge.

The crepes, chai, soup, etc is all awesome. And I appreciate good food, loved food.

But that's not why I go. Though it's reason enough.

I go because I love the owners. They are warm and kind. Their eyes are clear and beautiful and open. And they want me to be happy. Me likes. Me happy.

So yesterday, the owner says, "I'm not in the food business. I'm in the people business. You can get food anywhere."

Enough said.

would you watch?

The recent incident of the man who was struck by a car and others watched without helping him is sparking much discussion about our culture's willingness to help others.

We all want to believe we'd help someone in need. But do we do actually do it when the opportunity arises? Or do we hesitate? Do we watch? Are we afraid of making things worse? Are we waiting for someone else to do it?

1) What would you have liked done if that was you or your father or child?
2) What will you do this week to actively engage in helping someone else...in a little or big way?

Motto as of late: Don't just spectate. Participate.

no bad vibes

No bad vibes. All good vibes.

Just go sailing.

That's it. Nothing more. No predictions. No insights. Just go.

Oh...the folks sailing the boat had never done it on their own before. But besides the fact that I totally trust them....I also totally trust that I've built a strong relationship with my intuition and I trust I'll get guidance when needed. Rest of the time...just sail with it....

Motto as of late: Cheers

the blatantly obvious

Two coaches standing on the other side of the field. Not really speaking to each other at any game. When one speaks the other looks away or walks away. Kids confused about what to do.
Coaches ain't seeing eye-to-eye or collaborating.

At the end of the season, some parents are surprised by this. "Did you know there were problems between the coaches?" I was asked repeatedly. "Sure. They were never communicating with each other or responding to each other. I noticed."

"Well...." I heard..."You SEE things. Of course you noticed." Wink, wink.

But actually, it was totally non-psychic. Blatantly obvious to me, but not psychic. I have no inside scoop on why, the motivations, what's happening at a soul level, etc. Just the obvious lack of communication.

My teachers taught me to use all my senses and skills. I am a sensory person. Use it all. Use my reasoning. Use my emotions. Use my five senses. Use my sixth sense. (and when signals seem different, the sixth sense is the most accurate)

One of the best first steps in becoming more intuitive, is simply to notice everything more. Notice the colors of flowers, the sway of trees and how each is unique, the songs of birds, your various emotions, the different types of buildings on your drive to work, the many shades of of red in the room right now, the density of the wind on your skin, everything.

It's a richer, more vibrant life, and you become more attuned to noticing your sixth sense.

Notice the obvious. Notice the unseen.

Motto as of late: Notice what you notice...because that's a signal in itself

it's not impossible - please meet "Prove It"

Meet Prove It, my Inner Skeptic. Hello, Prove It. How are you today? Not sure. Okay.

I love Prove It. If I didn't have Prove It, I'd be off following some cult somewhere or just jumping on every bandwagon and drifting after every last crazy idea.

Thank you Prove It for keeping me straight, for helping me validate, experience, gain proof. You've kept me focused and I love ya.

I've developed a pretty nice relationship with Prove It over the last few years. We get along well now that we've stopped resisting each other and understand each other's roles. See, Meredith is meant to explore and learn and grow and stretch and try on new ideas and work through them. And Prove It is meant to keep Meredith in check. We collaborate.

There's a trick I've found to settling Prove It's intensity when he gets a bit out of hand. I remind Prove It that for some things, it can be a bit hard to prove but we've got lots of interesting evidence, enough to explore more anyway, so let's go. It's hard to prove 'I love you" too, afterall.

So...Prove It can sometimes be settled (though not sated) with the words....
"It's not impossible that _________________ is true."
I can't really prove it's true. But I can't really prove it isn't true either. So no need to get stuck. It's really not impossible that it is true. Keep going.

I so recommend getting to know and work with your inner skeptic. It's fabulously liberating.

Motto as of late: "And you don't believe it!??? That's shocking."

special shout out to fellow superblogger...i'm test driving a "motto" ending. totally dig your listening and feeling clever summarizers...may i adapt/adopt??

how's your strep throat?

"Um. What?" she asked questioning. "How did you know that?" responded my girlfriend to my greeting her phone call with a "Hey, girl, how's your strep throat doing?"

"Why, you told me a few days ago when we talked, I guess," I responded without really thinking about it, frankly.

"Um. No, Meredith. I didn't. Because I woke up with it this morning. In fact, I'm driving to the doctor right now. I didn't tell you. How did you know? You crack me up."

Funny. She's known me since I was 15 years old. She knows I 'know things' but it's still amusing to us both. I didn't even realize I was intuiting.

It's just so normal and I'm so used to 'just knowing' (claircognizance or 'clear knowing' is my primary way, then clairvoyant, then clairsentient, then clairaudient. not sure what you call clair-smellient, but I've experienced that too...and wonder if it is possible to be clair-tastient, lol...hoping all my wine tasting will develop into that, too...hmm...pleasant tastes only please?!).

Anyhow...
It goes back to my teacher Jim telling me not to get caught up in having to know if it's a thought or intuition or whatever, just follow it. I have clear thoughts. I have clear intuitions. Just go with it. Right on.

As it turns out, I think that strep throat intuition was meant to launch off a bit on the subject of intuition, which I believe my friend is exploring quite a bit as of late. So there really was a purpose in saying what I got and I'm glad it just flowed out of my mouth.

Motto as of late: Don't hold back.


I think it helps a lot of people to identify their intuitive style. By focusing on one's strength, one can better allow their intuition. That's one of my specializations in working with people, I 'just know' people's style and can suggest techniques best matched to one's style.

• Clairvoyance: Clear seeing. Seeing in the minds eye is a lot like seeing a memory or imagining a vision or picture, though sometimes it is stronger like a presence right there. (Do you tend to learn visually?)
• Clairaudience: Clear hearing. Hearing in the mind's ear is a lot like remembering a sound, though sometimes it is a lot stronger like I turn around. (Do you tend to learn by listening?)
• Clairsentience: Clear sensing. This is really feeling vibes in your body. (Do you tend to learn by doing or get strong sensations in your body?)
• Claircognizance: Clear knowing. 'I just know' is so close to a crystal clear thought, but it comes more from the belly than the mind, though can be hard to tell. It does have a ring, ping and clearness to it. A purity. Not so thick or dense as many thoughts. I work with a lot of claircognizant people to develop because it is a profound way of knowing but probably one of the hardest to trust. (Do you tend to get strong gut feelings without knowing why?)

With all that said...I've had psychic smells, too...don't feel you need to put yourself in one of these labels...describe it in your own words. And just like learning, most people have multiple styles that work, but stronger ones. What ways do you get intuitions?

UPDATE: just came across this:
Clairaliance: clear smelling (a favorite of spirits for connecting, mediumship)
Clairambience: clear tasting
makes sense that someone had a name for it.... :)

follow that glow

When I'm around certain people, and one particular person as of late, I see so much energy.

Interestingly, it isn't actually the other person glowing. It's as if I'm seeing my own energy field tune in and turn on. My hands buzz. I'm seeing all this wavy energy around myself, almost like heat off a highway.

Okay, I hear you. He turns me on or heats me up. Right on. But this only happens in certain moments, with certain people, and as sensual as I can be they are simply just not all turning me on. LOL. It's a signal to me to pay attention because there's something in me digging this or that can learn from this person. It's a pay attention signal, a 'hello' from myself, 'notice this now.' It's quite beautiful having such a physical signal.

By the way, this started back when I first learned Reiki. I love teaching energy work to others. Seeing the wonder on someone's face when they first feel the energy in their hands. Awesome. Anyway....

When I see myself glow, I follow the signal. And isn't it sweet to seriously say, "I just glow when i'm around him" ?

I've heard from others that they get physical sensations that signal them. Feel free to share yours.

the unmasking me

I wonder what are all the things I say about myself and who I am ....wait for it....that aren't actually true; my own little self delusions or masks of protection, the protective me rather than true me.

I am amused at how this one person I know who think he's so open-minded (and so do others) is actually quite a rigid thinker and a somewhat close-minded person who is extremely hard to convince of any new idea outside his mental construct. Yet there's this other person who says he 'needs rules' and doesn't have that same 'air of free thinker' emanating from him, yet he is the one who is totally willing to engage new concepts and ideas, explore and even embrace them. Fascinating really. They don't even see themselves this way. Others don't see, well, some of us do. But it is fascinating.

I think of myself as shy, but there is also plenty of evidence to the contrary.
To me, intuition is about listening to my true self and expressing my true self.
Underneath the masks, beneath the layers of defenses and shoulds and fears, that me.

The me that is unbridled.
The me that is the moment, and not an old story or fear of the future.
The me beyond my gender and race and suburban upbringing.

Of course, it gets more complex because there are all these parts of me...but still...I'm integrating them all and more consciously choosing what to express in the moment. That's the real purpose for intuition.
The inner guidance me.

This is what my intuition brings me as its gift. The ability to get through layers to truth of who I am, who others are, and bring it out.
The unmasking me.

The irony of my given name of Self isn't lost on me, for sure. Nor the collection of masks I started years ago...I didn't see it then, but I do now.

Time now for the tea me.

on a not so serious note

I did a couple readings for a mom whose daughter died recently. She wanted to, and we did, communicate with her daughter.

I wish the mom could feel, hear and see what I'm seeing. There's the mom, there's the daughter...they are on different planes, in different bodies...but I'm looking at their consciousness and their purpose and their connection and the beautiful interchange between them. I wish she could see how thin the boundary really is.

I enjoyed myself. I could hear the daughter's accent and feel her bright, mischievious and purposeful spirit. And the mom's spirit is so vibrant even in the midst of this sadness.

My teacher said my job is to just 'show up' and do what I do, be who I am. That's all I did. No more important than any other reading, no less important than any other reading. In fact, this person was experiencing significantly less distress than many who ask questions about relationships, career, moving, health and the like.

I think the mom, like many of my clients, is moving towards this thinner boundary. I think she'll be instrumental in others noticing this, as well. Bright spot on my day to see anyone tackling grief with such grace.

something to talk about in the locker room

I have a new role model....she's 80 and fabulous....and maude

Harold and Maude is a total must see movie. My son and I watched it recently and my 13 year old boy aspires to be more like this 80 year old woman. Awesome.

Intuition isn't just about seeing the future and answering all your questions now. It's about noticing, listening, hearing your true spirit and acting on it. Living creatively in each moment. Making choices based on your inner world and outer world. Maude is so in the moment and playful and free...and she frees others.

"*Reach* out. Take a *chance*. Get *hurt* even. But play as well as you can. Go team, go! Give me an L. Give me an I. Give me a V. Give me an E. L-I-V-E. LIVE! Otherwise, you got nothing to talk about in the locker room. " -Maude

People around me often want me to come up with something magical or predict something. But I really just want to live a normal life. I'm happy to use my sixth sense to tune into the spirit of others to help them, but day-to-day, I really just want to be Maude...living life. And as my teacher Jim says, all I really have to do is just "Show Up."

giggling at gum

Standing in line to get a lovely cup of chai latte, oh my treat, I see a girl giggling and jumping up and down. Simply because she was going to get a piece of gum. Oh, the thrill with her arms reached to the sky in anticipation. Raw. Pure. No holding back.

I giggled too. And when I got my chai, I smiled wide in eagerness and sipped it as the delicacy it is to me. I just can't get the milk steamed quite like this. I gave thanks for a few things, like the ability to delight in something frivolous like chai latte on occasion, as well as my son and friends and the cool air and my favorite jeans with the holes ripped in the knees and my dog that is calming down and....

People remark to me sometimes that I'm like a little girl. I believe it is meant as a compliment...but I take it that way none the less. I hope that with each passing day I become simultaneously younger and older, with perfect harmony between the two. Caring less and less what others think, laughing more at myself, being more present in the moment. Giggling at gum. Chai cheers to that....

you're too independent you know

My son reminded me again, in his perfect timing, of something to pay attention to now.

There's an area in my life where I need to make some corrections and get on track. Was mediating in the am on some ways to do this. One of the messages was to allow myself to receive help, which I quickly did a 'yeah, right, this is my problem let me deal with it' attitude, but I'll do the other things that came up.

Well in the evening, I was talking to my son about getting him to and from soccer. He suggested I let someone else drive him. I said, "No. I'll do it." He looked at me, in the 'wise eyes' mode, and said, "You are being too independent. You really should let others help you." I told him it's no big deal I can drive him. He again, in sage mode, said, "No. I mean about everything. You really should let people help you more."

Funny. I'm so willing to help others. I have to be willing to receive as well as give. Receive in areas where I can use support and give in the areas where I can support others. It's so obvious. I was thinking more of a one-to-one correlation on the topics of giving and receiving, but time, money, love, teaching are all energy and can all exchange for each other. Duh.

I'm letting someone who offered to help me, help me.


Do you give more? Or receive more? How are you balancing independence and interdependence in your life?

so, you admit you're psychic

There's this wide, wide step between knowing you have some psychic experiences and saying "I'm psychic."

But we are all psychic and have this natural sense. And psychic just means 'of the soul'...not fortune telling the next day's events. I talk to people repeatedly who've had dozens, hundreds, countless experiences with intuitions yet struggle to admit they are psychic. It's not a special power, folks. It's just our sixth sense readily available to us.

I say, you name it-you claim it.

I'd love to see some of you blog readers comment back on this post and somewhere in there say it...'I'm psychic.' Go ahead. You can do it. You will inspire others to do the same and it will significantly magnify the strength of your own psychic sense. Let's hear it....take a moment to comment.

And then check out how my son encouraged me to do it:
Mom, tell him what you really do

buttons, buttons...who pushed my buttons!?

Are there some people, especially those closest to you, who can just push your buttons...rather, your buttons just go haywire around them at times? Uh, yeah. Got that going on.

Actually, the buttons kinda implode and crack and spew...they don't just push. Just being honest.

I've been watching myself closely in these button launching moments as of late. I'm watching them like a bad movie that I should turn off but just don't seem to move to change the channel.

I mean, I dearly, deeply love and respect the person who witnesses (had to scratch out 'causes') the button fiasco happening...so...next time, I'll try "changing the channel "and just see what happens. As I go in the 'lovey' channel again, I can simply choose to button and unbutton without so much tension... I mean, so much about intuition is about being more aware, more perceptive, more conscious in my choices...so I like this analogy to notice, observe and choose to just change the channel.

I think I should name the channel just to make it more powerful. Higher Reasoning Channel. Channel Love. Channel 4 (mind-body-emotions-spirt..all working together). Open to suggestions....

twenty-four fantabulous hours of exposure to beautiful people

The past 24 hours has been so inspiring with my clients, one after another after another...from last night to this morning to this evening.

Ahhhh. As I have the pleasure and priviledge to see other's vulnerability and true self, both strengths and weaknesses, I find myself filled with awe at the beauty, the brilliance of the human spirit....underneath at all. In contrast to the mental suffering we put ourselves through based on untruths.

In my own life, I was reminded so many times this 24 hours of ways I make my own life (and those I love) harder sometimes (sometimes a lot!). It's really just some bad habits to clear up. But for today, I smile at such silliness and poorly placed energy.

The beauty of all these creative, conscious, exploring, open people fills me with the interest to simply enjoy each moment today. Each moment. The health questions, the car buying, the silliness, the doubts, the dancing, the eating, the everything.

For today only, I choose to see beauty in others. And tomorrow, I'll start over and choose the same.